Two Months On – No, It’s Not Another Mammoth Review

September 12, 2008

Good morning readers!


And happy Blog-iversary! Two months ago today, on the 12th July, I began this blog in the silence of my room after returning from 8 days and nights that changed my life forever.


There have been some ups, there have been some downs, and pretty much all of those moods and events have been documented in this blog.


Thanks to all of you for tuning in – whether you come to see me every day, or you just stop by every time I mention sex. Despite writing this blog to externalise whatever mess is inside my head on any given day, it’s nice to know that I have an audience, too. I don’t know that my smile has ever been as wide as when someone emailed me to say he had found me through a Google search, and that my blog had helped them remember their own process, which ended a long, long time, before mine even started.


I am writing today’s entry from the comfort of my kitchen; drinking a cup of tea, and in little more than my boxers and a t-shirt. THIS is the way a Friday should be spent, people.


Unfortunately, someone has put the Jeremy Kyle show – a ridiculous British take on Jerry Springer, etc – and I can’t find the TV controls. Bah!


This coming weekend, I am setting myself a challenge – be alone.


In the two months since I finished The Hoffman Process, I have done some pretty good work if I do say so myself, but there have been a few lingering and/or new patterns I have become aware of. One of the big ones is about loneliness and insecurity, so I have decided to combat that this weekend by spending time with myself, and trying to explore and recognise the points where these feelings appear, and see if I can do some positive work with them.


My plans this weekend? Zero.


Of course, I don’t want to paint a picture of some Zen-like experience, where I am sat in a permanent state of meditation, but amongst the movies, the football, and occasional run, with or without post-it notes, I hope to just learn to be a little more comfortable with this awkward little person I call ‘me’.


It doesn’t sound all that thrilling, but at least you’ll have some movie reviews to look forward to on Monday.


And that is pretty much it for today people. I know its not particularly long or interesting, but there’s only so much I can say about sitting in the kitchen and a weekend of doing nothing. Would you like to know what I had for breakfast? Sultana Bran and Marmite on toast. And now I really am out of facts.


So, until Monday, when I promise things will be a lot more interesting.


All my love,

Closed Box


2 Responses to “Two Months On – No, It’s Not Another Mammoth Review”

  1. posteret Says:

    Marmite – bleaugh!
    I hope you have a lovely weekend, enjoy the solitude. I always a find a nice long bath with a good book is a great way to spend a few hours.
    I hope you’ve got popcorn for the movies!

  2. Powerless and Afraid(less so) Says:

    Back in the day i was going to write a blog like yours, but then i got too scared.
    Scared of revealing my self, even though that was the main point.
    I made a couple of self pitying posts and then forgot about all about it.
    Im unsure it will be as prolific as yours, but i hope i will have the courage to be honest enough to write the truth as it exists in eac moment.
    As the months went by after my process i began to feel ashamed that i had not achieved the truly life shattering changes that other people had experienced which i had read about. I recognise now that a lot of it it comes down to personal choice and recomiting to changing.
    I have decided to push though some of my fear and start blogging again. Im not sure where this will end up but my goal or intention is to start being honest again, at the very least to myself, and open my world up a little. Feel free to take a look. Theres not a lot there at the moment, besides some flash back of some darker moments back in time but who knows where i will end up?

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